Am I Doing Enough?

As a mom, I often wonder, “Am I doing enough?”

Sure I carried both my children for nine months, nursed them until my nipples felt like they were going to fall off, woke up countless times a night only to put them back to sleep while I stayed up all night because I couldn’t finish my Adam Levine dream.

Sure, I cleaned all kinds of poop and other bodily fluids (still do that actually!).

Sure I deal with tantrums and countless sibling arguments over Barbies and other toys that make me wish I could just disappear at times.

Sure I quit my job to raise my kids. That saw the evaporation of regular conversation that doesn’t include figuring out if Sprout is showing a new Caillou or if it’s one we’ve seen too many times. It meant making so many other sacrifices too numerous to mention.

With all of that, why do I still question if I’m doing enough? Why do I wonder if I’m doing enough to make sure my kids are learning enough when they are home with me? Is my oldest writing her letters like other four year-olds? Can my youngest tell the difference between orange and yellow? Is she saying enough words? Am I taking them to do enough activities? Am I reading enough books?

Aahh!!! I could go on and on.

After thinking about it for a bit, I’ve come to a semi-conclusion. I’m sure some people may not like it, but I’m gonna throw it out there anyway.

Because I am a SAHM, and obviously spend a lot of time  at home,  I think I put more pressure on myself to make sure I am doing enough. Instead of getting things done in the house or going through some magazines (yeah right!), I feel as though I should be doing something with them or for them because I am home. This is my job, right?  Does anyone else feel this way?

I know when I was working I felt guilty that I wasn’t spending enough time with my daughter. But, I also knew I was working and contributing to the household income, which in turn was benefitting her. So it felt like it was enough.

There are so many days I just want to lay on the couch and get lost in my DVR shows while enjoying a cup of coffee while it is still hot. It’s not to say that my kids don’t know how to entertain themselves, because they do. There are times when I do “sneak” off to get something done or try to relax. I could probably do it more often, but I don’t. So sometimes I am my worst enemy. There, I fully admit it.

In the end, am I doing enough? Probably so.

Will I ever truly feel as though I am? Probably not.


Blogaversaries Really Get You Thinking

It’s just before seven in the morning on a rather cloudy morning and my children are still sleeping. Ahhh…

I dragged myself out of bed and went to the gym, knowing full well that one hour was probably the only time I will have to myself for the next 12-14 hours or so. I’m contemplating putting on some makeup today seeing that we have some errands and stuff to do and I won’t just be home with the kiddos. I’m also thinking about all the little projects I want to get done, but probably won’t today. It’s okay, there’s always tomorrow.

I’m also thinking about how I need some time to search for some ideas and writing opportunities. Most likely that will have to get done when everyone is sleeping again. Maybe I can throw on “Frozen” for the umpteenth time, and get some things done then. Decisions, decisions.

As I sit here and think about my day ahead, I can’t help but think about how different my life is today versus three years ago when I started this blog.

I was working out of the home. Today I am not. If you told me I would be a SAHM, I would have told you to have your head examined. Today, I realize it’s not so bad. In fact, it’s a good thing for both me and my kids, although I want to rip my hair out at times.

Three years ago, we were a family of three. Today we are a family of four. My girls are growing so much each and every day, too fast in my opinion. Today, I try to savor all the hugs, kisses, and “I love yous” because I know too soon they will be replaced with plenty of yelling and door slamming as my girls enter their pre-teen years and beyond.

When I started this blog, I had no idea what I was doing. Well, not much has changed there! But, I know writing this has lead me to other opportunities and has let me meet other great moms. For that, I am forever thankful.

Three years ago, I didn’t know what the future holds. Today, I still don’t. But, I’m more at peace with the idea that everything happens for a reason and at the right time. Sometimes you just have to let things go and breathe, which is much easier said than done.

Wow, that’s a lot of deep thinking for so early in the morning!

So, yes, all these thoughts were prompted by my third blogaversary this week. By the way, I am accepting gifts, lol!

I look forward to continue writing and see where this craziness takes me. I hope you are all up for the ride as well! Thanks so much to everyone who has supported me on this journey so far. Now, time for my coffee!


This Bites

“That’s mine.”

“No, mine.”

“I had it first”.

Scream. Cry. Ouch!!!!

Run for mommy.

Can you guess what just happened again in my house? Let me set the scene. My two and four year-old are fighting over some stupid toy. Big sister doesn’t let little sister have it. Sisters fight over said toy. Big sister still won’t give up. Little sister gets totally aggravated, goes nuts and decides to bite big sister in anger. Big sister is hurt and now wants mommy. Little sister knows this is bad and goes into time out corner on her own.

This is what goes on in my house more frequently than I would like to admit. Saying this makes me lose my mind is the understatement of the year. I lose it. I start screaming. It accomplishes nothing.

My younger daughter knows this is wrong, yet still continues to do it. The funny, not so funny, thing about it is that she only bites her sister. She doesn’t bite other kids (thank Jesus for that one) nor does she bite any adults. It is just her sister.

I never had a sister growing up, so I don’t know if this is normal. I’m hoping it is just some part of the terrible two phase we are constantly going through on a daily basis. Whatever it is, I honestly can’t take much more of it and neither can my older daughter. She’s had her share of battle scars.

When my older daughter was around the two-year-old mark I remember she bit people a few times, but thankfully her stint was short lived. This time around, I feel like we are in it for the longer haul. My blood pressure and vocal cords can’t take it! If she is going to be aggressive, I would much rather she hit her sister. Not that hitting is a great behavior either, but I think biting is just so barbaric, not to mention more painful.

While I can usually anticipate when the next bite is going to happen, sometimes it happens for no reason at all. I know all of this is part of having kids, yada yada yada. However you slice it, it bites. Period.






There’s Milk in My Bed & It’s 4 a.m.

Kids are messy. Kids are noisy. Kids are…well…kids. Part of a being a parent is knowing to expect the unexpected. You just never know what’s going to happen. I never learned this lesson as much as I did at four o’clock this morning. Let me set the scene for you. My two-year-old was crying and yelling in her bed. Enter one child into mommy and daddy’s bed. The four-year-old hears the commotion. Enter child number two into mommy and daddy’s bed. Everyone falls asleep. Great. Then, some Gremlin must have poked my two-year-old. She started yelling for Caillou. We ignore it. She yells louder. Can you see why I have such a hateful attitude towards this character? Anyway, I proceed to put the TV on in hopes of calming her down and getting her back to sleep so everyone else can sleep again too.

Everything is going well. I’m drifting off. My husband is snoring. My four-year-old is sleeping. I don’t hear the two-year-old. I was wrong. She starts yelling for milk. We ignore it. She yells louder. I get up to get her milk. I don’t want you all to think she always gets what she wants, but when it’s four in the morning, sleep is the goal, not lesson teaching, so sue me!

She gets her milk. I go to the bathroom. I walk out and hear a “splat” followed by a cry…followed by another cry. I look at my two-year-old. Drops of milk are falling from her hair, dribbling down her face and all over her soaked pajamas. I start laughing. I wished I picked up my phone and snapped a picture. My daughter was so shocked and disgusted. It was classic. I guess someone didn’t put the lid on the sippy cup tight enough. What do you want from me? It was four in the morning and I did it with one eye open, without my glasses!

Then, my four-year-old starts to scream. “My Mickey Mouse jammies!! Mickey Mouse!!”

Girlfriend was flipping out because one of her favorite pairs of pj’s was now soaked with milk as well. Don’t cry over spilled milk child!

So, let’s recap…I have two milk-soaked children as well as a bed full of milk and two parents that don’t know if they should laugh some more or cry they are so tired. Did I mention it’s four in the morning? Yep…it is. So, we proceed to dry everyone ,change everyone and everything and regroup. This includes putting towels all over the bed so we can try to go back to sleep.  What a mess!

Once all is said and done, there’s more drama, tossing, turning, and re-locating, but everyone does get back to sleep.

So, what’s the morale of the story? Expect the unexpected…oh and, make sure you fasten that sippy cup lid!

Yoga Workout Essentials

If you’re a mom, there’s a good chance you could use a little Zen in your life. Am I right? I remember pre-kids and diapers, I used to be a yogi. I used to attend one class a week, religiously. Now, not so much. Throw in two kids, school, activities, and crazy schedules and you get less and less time for relaxation. It’s funny because I know I could use it more now than ever before. Now, if they just had a yoga class at midnight…anyway, I digress.

But, I remember there were a few things I always made sure I had so I had the best experience possible during a yoga class. The first thing is to make sure you have the best workout gear. Having the right clothes can make all the difference. That’s especially the case if you’re doing bikram yoga, or “sweaty yoga” like so many people call it. When the room is heated to one hundred plus degrees, you don’t necessarily want to wear your most comfy sweats. That’s why a good pair of bikram yoga shorts is always a good idea. This way you can really maximize your workout and look great in the process. They’re stretchy and comfy so you can really get the best workout.

The other essential is a good mat. I was never one to use the mats provided at the studio. Although you can always clean them off, there’s just something about having your own. You know your germs, not someone else’s!

I also always liked to bring a good water bottle. I know you can always grab a plastic bottle on the go. But, I like the ones that were insulated with a flip top. These were always the best because they not only kept water cold, but also were easier to flip open in the middle of a workout. It’s such a pain to have to stop mid downward facing dog and unscrew a bottle. It’s much easier to flip and pose.

Now that you have the right gear, time to strike a pose and relax. Namaste!





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