A is for Apple, B is for…

   Parents get so excited when they hear their kids say new words. I have to say every time my two-and-a-half year old says something new I feel like Albert Einstein’s momma. Wow, she’s getting so smart I tell myself. She must really be listening to everything I am telling her. She’s such a little sponge! Actually these days, she’s more of a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser because she’s grasping words I am not even directing towards her too. Oh yes, ladies and gentlemen we’ve come to the point where I am spelling out words so she can’t figure out what I am saying. It’s all because she now says boob. Not just boob, but boobie, and of course, because you can’t have one without the other, the plural… boobies. When she first said it I thought I was hearing things. So I asked, “What did you just say?” “Boob, momma.” Yep, that’s what I thought.

 It’s not like we go around the house saying the word, but, I am sure she has heard it so many times when we are talking about breastfeeding. Sorry, but we don’t say breast, we say boob. It’s better than using the “T” word, don’t ya think? Nevertheless, I don’t want her going around pointing to a woman’s chest and saying boob all the time. The sad thing is she sounds so funny when she says it. I bite my tongue so I don’t laugh. Yes, there is a 12-year-old boy trapped inside of me! But, if you hear her say it, which I hope you won’t, you would laugh too!

   It doesn’t stop there. She not only says the word, but knows what they are used for. She’ll say boobies, then takes her Abby Caddabby doll and proceed to breastfeed her. In case you didn’t know, fairies in training like breast milk, remember that. In any case, I guess she could be saying worse things. But, sometimes I feel like a “boob” for saying it around her in the first place!

Here We Grow Again

   Capri pants in winter? No, it’s just what it looks like these days since my two-and-a-half-year-old had some kind of growth spurt. Some of her shirts also look like she has the 3/4 length sleeve thing going on too, but she doesn’t. Mom just hasn’t been able to keep up. As for the nearly four month old, she’s also starting to bust out of her clothes. I know when it’s time to retire a onesie when I can’t get her head to squeeze through the hole and when she gives me that look like “mom, you ‘re seriously going to try to pour me into this outfit?” Yeah, I know, they’re growing.

  It’s not just the clothes. It just seems like lately there is so much more “growing on” in my house. The baby just started to roll over. She was on the verge for days last week. She was trying and pushing but always got stuck on the last hurdle. Then one day my mom came over and that’s when the baby decided to roll over during the two minutes I went to the bathroom. Seriously? Yep, just can’t make this stuff up. I know kids have the worst timing, but come on, give a momma a break! Then there’s the issue of her bassinet and her one-way ticket to her new room.Okay, who are we kidding, we all know it’s round trip! I knew the transition to her crib was coming. It was pretty obvious when one morning I woke up and she turned herself horizontally and had her legs rested up on the side like she was lounging at Club Med. So, this week (or maybe next), the big move down the hall begins. It’s just another sign she’s growing up.

   My little spunky now two-and-a-half year old surprises me everyday. She’s busting out new words all the time. I wonder if she’s reading the encyclopedia before bedtime. Wait, we don’t have any encyclopedias! I’ve also noticed she’s much more of a sponge than she was before. She remembers every little thing. Nothing is getting past her. Now, we’re also at the point where we have to watch our mouths. I’m afraid one day she’s just going to start singing a litany of profanities she’s heard throughout her little life. Oops! Mommy and Daddy can have a potty mouth at times!

   There’s also the issue of pre-school. I’m excited for her to go and explore new things and meet new friends, but that just means she’s growing up. A letter came the other day for an open house for the pre-school we’re thinking of sending her to in the fall. As I was opening it, I got a little sad to think that we are inching towards that point. Don’t even come talk to me when she goes to Kindergarten. Although by that point with the two of them, I may be ready for it too!

   I know it’s cliche, but kids really do grow up so fast, which means we are also getting older. Ugh. I looked in the mirror the other day and thought to myself, wow, I’m “X” years old and I have two kids, and all the responsibilities that go along with my mortgage coupon book. When did that happen? What happened to that girl who could go out every night of the week and still get up for her 8 a.m. class? She’s still here. She’s just taken on some new hobbies like watching her children grow.

Marking Milestones

   Graduations, weddings..they’re among the milestones that parents cry and sigh over. I know those are way down the road for me, but there are some little milestones happening right now that are already getting me a little misty. My daughter just turned two and she’s doing so many things on her own now. I know, I know, it’s part of life, but I don’t want to see her grow up! Parents who have already gone through these things can relate I’m sure.

   Before I became a mom, I used to roll my eyes when I heard other moms talk about milestones like first steps, first words, etc. Sure they’re great I thought, but nothing to grab the Kleenex box over. But, now that I have experienced those things I can totally relate and can’t believe what an idiot I was. Those are really BIG deals. I’ll admit when my daughter took her first steps, I cried. When she first said “momma” I screamed really loud. I was so excited that she knew who I was and could verbalize it. Now, she won’t stop saying it, which is a subject for an entirely different blog!
   Now that she’s two, a lot of my duties are done. My job of feeding her is basically over. I just cut up her food and put it on her plate and she eats it all by herself. This milestone is a great one, because I can now actually eat my food while it’s semi-hot. Not necessarily one to cry over, but still a change that signals she’s no longer a little baby.
   Gone are the days of loading her up in the baby carrier and bringing her to and from the car. No more trying to balance her and bags and keys and whatever else may be in my hands at the time. Now, I just get her out of the car seat and watch her walk to the door and wait for me to open it. Again, not a particularly bad thing going on here.
   But one thing that really pulled at my heart strings happened about a month ago when we put the toddler rails on her crib. We just kinda figured it was time and we should do it. The minute they went on and she realized she could climb in and out of bed herself. It was a whole new world. She now has a big girl pillow and knows she can sleep like everyone else. By getting out of bed whenever she wants, she is getting her first taste of freedom. No more waiting for mommy or daddy to come in and scoop her out of the crib.  She also knows she can fall out of bed if she’s not careful. And she did, but only once. I don’t think she liked that part of it very much, But I think she does enjoy getting up before us and running into our room as we’re still trying to figure out what time of the morning it is. Right now it’s a quarter past my little baby is growing up. Soon it will ten till she gets her license and starts liking boys (God help us!). I know we have a ways to go, and there are so many more milestones to mark before we get to that point.
  I’ve come to realize that having a child really gives you a true grasp of how precious time really is. One minute you’re holding them in the hospital and the next they’re ready to say bye-bye. So, I think we shouldn’t just mark milestones, but try to mark minutes, hours, and days because you’re never going to get them back.

Hey, Your Baby Can Read… Really?

   Okay, I’m coming clean. I became so mesmerized with the “Your Baby Can Read” commercial that I actually ordered the reading system that promises to help your child learn to read. But, it wasn’t just the commercial that made me run to jot down the number and grab my phone and MasterCard. During my daughter’s last well visit, the pediatrician asked how many words were in her vocabulary. My husband and I looked at each other, trying not to laugh. Vocabulary? Um, she was 15 months at the time. She doesn’t really have a vocabulary. Then it got me thinking. Is she behind? Is she a slow learner? What’s the deal? Maybe I need some help.
   We read together constantly and she really seems to enjoy it. So, I thought “Your Baby Can Read” would be the perfect next step to help move things along. In case you’re not familiar, the set comes with several DVDs, books, and flashcards all aimed at teaching words and promoting reading. I guess you’re supposed to start when the kids are younger, but the guy over the phone said it was o-k if I started now, and gullible me said o-k.
   I should have known something was up when I called and they said the $14.95 price advertised was just for the 30 day trial. If I decided to keep it, they were going to charge my credit card three monthly payments of 60-something-dollars. Again, I said o-k. I really believed this was the key to my child becoming the next Einstein.
So, the huge box arrives. There were so many DVDs and books, it looked like I robbed the library. I started reading the parents’ instructions and off we were with the the first DVD.
   Problem one…I couldn’t get my daughter to sit still to watch two minutes of the dumb DVD. So, I watched it and thought how does this stuff really work? Hmmm. Next were the flashcards. Attention span…5 minutes. We tried this routine for the next four days. Then, I finally decided I’m wasting my time and hers. She’s not buying this, and now I’m not either. (At least she’s the smart one!).
   When I called the company to get information to return it, the rep asked me if I wanted more time. I said no, my daughter is clearly not interested in it. She won’t sit and watch the DVDs. Then the lady said, “Well, are you watching them with her?” Really lady? I bit my tongue and simply said yes, but told her I still wanted to return the stuff.
   Days after sending it back, I heard on the news that the FTC is questioning the company’s reading promises and has filed a complaint claiming “Your Baby Can Read” uses deceptive advertising. I could have told you that one. My baby may not be able to read yet, but she sure knows a scam when she sees one.
Just curious, has anyone had success with this program?