Beating the Baby Bottle

“Ba ba…ba ba…ba BAAAAA”. For the love of Christmas, you would think you were on a farm with
Mary and her lambs. But, no, it was my house. All. The. Time. It was all thanks to my two-year-old and her addiction to the bottle. She was in love. She wanted her bottle morning, noon, night and every other time in between. That is until last week when I was a little bored and decided it was time to beat the bottle before it beat me anymore.

It was one on of those rainy days when you know you’re not going anywhere and you kinda run out of things to do with your kids. I know a lot of you know where I am coming from here. So, I was cleaning the kitchen as the girls were playing in the living room when I looked over at my bottle drying rack. Ugly. That’s what I thought. Annoying. I really hated buying those bottle liners and hated washing the nipples even more. I especially hated going through so much damn milk. So, I decided to “nipple” a bad habit in the Bud…or in this case…the Playtex. I threw all the paraphernalia in the dishwasher and decided to tell my daughter there were no more bottles. Period.

Cold turkey was the way to go. I did it with my first daughter too. Weaning is for wimps (don’t get offended, it’s a joke). Since I got my little one off the boob cold turkey after a nasty nipple mishap, I decided it would work here too with her bottle bestie.

When I heard the call of the “ba ba” I filled a sippy cup of milk and presented to my little princess.

She looked it at and said “no”. “Ba ba”.

Me: “This is your new ba ba.”

Her: “No”

Me: “Yes” ( as I handed it to her)

She then decided to do what every normal two-year-old would. She threw her cup at me and then herself on the floor kicking and screaming.

I took a deep breath and let the show play out without pausing or fast forwarding it. My older daughter just stared at her sister and then carried on with her dolls. Within about five minutes, the screaming stopped. Then, something magical happened. She picked up her sippy cup of milk and went to sit on the couch to watch her show. OMG! I actually won round one! My inner mommy was doing cartwheels. But, I couldn’t let her know how excited I was. I knew this wasn’t over.

Our little bottle battle continued pretty much the same way for the rest of day one. But each time, the bottle meltdowns were shorter. I honestly couldn’t believe it was so easy. I toyed with giving her a bottle at bed, but decided to stand strong against the evils of the nipple. I knew if she tasted the forbidden fruit again we would be back to square one. So, I just let her work it out. And she did.

The next morning she asked for the “ba ba” again. I handed her a cup fully expecting it to be thrown back in my face, yet again. But, this time, she calmly took it from me and just started drinking it. Forget cartwheels. My inner mommy was now part of Cirque du Soleil! I was so happy. I did it! Within two days I got her to beat the bottle and gained some more kitchen counter space. It may sound lame, but it really is the little things.

Here we are almost a week later and we haven’t seen a bottle. Hurray! Don’t get me wrong, I still think she wonders what the heck happened, but she knows there’s no turning back.Because of my success, I wholeheartedly recommend cutting the kids off cold turkey when it comes to getting rid of the bottle. Just expect the kicking, screaming, and throwing that goes along with it!

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