It’s the age-old question that always ruffles feathers and this time is no different. Can women have it all? That of course, depends on who you ask. If you choose to ask Drew Barrymore, she’s gonna tell you no. She recently talked about how much it sucks to have to give up some aspects of your career so you don’t miss out on things in your kids’ lives.(Her words, not mine!) As you can imagine, her words have captured a lot of attention, mine included.
After reading what she had to say, I think she’s brave to admit what so many of us are sometimes afraid to. Sometimes women can’t have it “all” if “all” means having a killer career and making every activity and being there for every play date. It’s just impossible. That’s not to say that women can’t be successful and still be good mothers. Being a stay-at-home mother does not, by any means, make you a better mother.
Now that we’ve cleared that up, I think having it “all” means different things to different people. That’s okay. I think it’s supposed to. I think that going by a universal definition is what has gotten so many of us feeling inadequate in the first place. Having it “all” has made a lot of us feel like crap if we can’t work forty hours a week, make dinner every night, have a clean house, and still have energy to play dress up with our kids. That’s why I respect Drew Barrymore’s comments that women can’t have it all.
I know a lot of moms, myself included, who have made professional sacrifices in order to be more present in their children’s lives. I know it’s not a choice that everyone has the luxury of making these days. There are lots of sacrifices that come along with the choice. Trust me, there are plenty of days when I wonder if I made the right decision. There are plenty of days that I play the “what if” game. But, in the end, I truly believe everything happens for a reason and when it is supposed. You just have to trust in yourself and try not to look back (easier said than done).
So, are Drew Barrymore’s comments setting women back a few decades? I’m sure there are plenty of you out there who still think so, and that’s fine. I still choose to believe that it’s okay to admit that it may be impossible to have it “all”.